Meanwhile, on the mid-deck Jackie was sipping a cup of herbal tea before bed, while Sally was lingering over her morning cup-o-joe. The creases on one side of her face and her disheveled hair indicated that she had been sleeping hard. “May we use the commons?” Valerie asked, referring to the mid-deck common area, as she stepped off the ladder and through the hatch, followed closely by Tom. “We have something private to discuss.”<\/p>\n
“Sure,” Jackie said, picking up her cup and heading for the stateroom.<\/p>\n
“I’ll go on down to the control center,” Sally agreed, as she grabbed her cup and juggled the hot toaster pastry that had just popped up.<\/p>\n
“That’s fine, thanks,” said Valerie. “Oh, and Sally, I’d like to have a chat with you also, later on today.”<\/p>\n
Sally shot Tom a worried look over her shoulder, then started down the ladder, but stopped to let Carl complete his climb, as he was on his way up. The puzzled glance Tom returned her way as he shrugged told Sally he didn’t have a clue as to why the doctor wanted to speak to him in private. His thoughts immediately focused on his medical exam from three days ago. “So level with me doc. How long have I got?” He tried to smile and play it off, but knew by the look on Valerie’s face this was something very serious.<\/p>\n
“Pardon me, just passing through,” Carl announced as he headed off toward the other stateroom, barely glancing at Tom.<\/p>\n
“I wish it were that simple,” Valerie told Tom. “I’m recommending you take the next few days off. You’re not even going to want to be here when I tell you what has happened. Sit down, Tom.” Valerie pulled out one of the stools to sit on. Tom followed suit. “Tom, I’m so sorry, but there’s no easy way to say this…” tears began to well up in her eyes and trickle down her cheeks, as she choked out the words. “It’s Penny. She’s gone.”<\/p>\n
It took a moment for the statement to sink in. “What do you mean: gone?” He asked in a whisper. Valerie reached across the table and tightly grasped his hand.<\/p>\n
“Penny was at your cabin in Colorado. It looks like she may have been heading into town when there was a blowout. The car smashed through a cliff side guardrail. She is dead, Tom.”<\/p>\n
“No!” He shouted, bolting to his feet and then slowly sinking back onto the seat. “She can’t be. It must have been someone else!” He was shaking, his eyes darting from side to side, trying to find a plausible explanation, and failing. “How can… Are they sure? How do they know, for sure?”<\/p>\n
“Tom, they wouldn’t have notified me if they weren’t. Penny’s folks got the call from the sheriff yesterday afternoon and contacted Mission Support. Her mom, dad and sister are en route to tend to things on your behalf. You can get in touch with them when you are able and let your wishes be known. Other than that, we’re stuck out here with at least twenty-two months to go. Twenty-six if we land.”<\/p>\n
Tom blinked a few times, wide-eyed and bewildered. “If we land?” he repeated, while swallowing as if to keep from being sick.<\/p>\n
“Well, if it came right down to it, Morgan said a fly-by, swinging around Mars with a free-return trajectory could put us back home in about twenty-two months. They would have to launch a splashdown capsule for us, but it’s an option… Just in case we need it,” Valerie patted his clenched hands, trying to comfort him or trying to lend support.<\/p>\n
“Tom, I know this is totally out of the blue. No one could ever have imagined a freak accident like this happening to one of our loved ones. Hell, I didn’t even have a clue about Sally getting divorced until just a few moments ago. But, turn this around and look at it from the other side.” She gave him a moment to comprehend, but it just wasn’t sinking in.<\/p>\n
“Go on,” he said.<\/p>\n
“OK, look. When we signed up for this mission, we did so with the full knowledge that one or more of us might not make it home alive. Agreed?”<\/p>\n
“It’s not the same thing!” He jumped to his feet again, this time knocking the stool over and started pacing across the small space. “Not the same thing at all. I didn’t sign on for my wife to be the one killed! That get-together we had with all of our families and spouses was to get them used to the idea that one of us on the ship might not make it back… to assure them they would be taken care of, for life… but that was for them… to get them ready, just in case! Not us! I’m not prepared to accept the fact that Penny might be dead!” Tom added as he righted the stool and collapsed back down onto it, dropping his head down onto his crossed arms.<\/p>\n
“I understand, Tom. There are terrifying and evil things in our lives that we just don’t ever expect to happen and would never even think to prepare for. If I had to pick one of the crew, predicting he or she wouldn’t be able to cope with a tough situation, between you and me, the top of my list would have been Sally. But, she seems to be coping quite well with a pending divorce. It will be tough and overwhelming, Tom. But, mourning, grief, and sadness are all natural reactions to a loss of this magnitude. Even anger, rage at the world and yourself. Always remember: What defines who we are, is how we deal with the challenges.<\/p>\n
“Now, we can turn tail and run, if you can call it running. We can return to Earth in twenty-two months, or we can do what we came out here to do… explore Mars, because going home early won’t bring Penny back. I know that sounds terribly harsh right now, but give it a few days,” Valerie could hear the soft sounds of Tom’s muffled sniffling. “You’ve got to let it out, Tom. Go ahead.” Reluctantly raising his head to look at her, tears were pooling in his eyes. Valerie stood up slowly, walked around the table, wrapped her arms around his shoulders, and lowered her cheek to his head. “Go ahead, let it out. It’s ok to cry.” Tom cried as Valerie’s tears dampened his hair.<\/p>\n
At a point about half way down the ladder, just out of sight, Sally had heard everything. She stood there, sobbing into her hands, mourning both for Tom’s loss and her own.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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